“Knowing that We’re Conservative Christians…”

Dear Kiddo,

Knowing we’re conservative Christians, why would you think we would approve of your sexual identity changes? It’s very unsettling to us and is causing us a lot of emotional pain. We beg you not to go forward with this chemical therapy!

You don’t know yet how different things will be for you in the working world and how difficult getting your first job can be. College is universally thought of as a place to learn new ideas but things typically change after you get your first job and are away from the academic community.

Changing your body chemistry could be an invitation to cancer. You’ve always respected your body more than the average person by being a vegan – aren’t you being naïve thinking you can change your body chemistry after 22 years and not cause massive health issues?

Your dad brought up this point: Pumping your body full of male hormones will cause aggressive behavior. Men release this aggression with an orgasm. How are you going to deal with these aggressive feelings?

You say you are our son – How can you say that to us when we changed your diapers for over 2 years and have a copy of your DNA showing you’re clearly a female?

Provided you still want us to come up next weekend, we plan to come up Sunday for the graduation ceremony. We don’t want to embarrass you in front of your friends and mentors. We do not want to cause a scene.

Love, Mom and Dad

Where to start? My parents have a way of crafting responses to my letters that just blows my mind. I need to be working on finals cram week stuff right now but I can’t focus until I at least make some sort of comment.

I could pick apart their psuedo-science but there is no need. An invitation to cancer? Men release aggressive behavior with an orgasm? It’s almost too embarrassing to publish. This gives a good picture of what I grew up with though. And the point about them being conservative Christians is news to me. Pretty sure I remember them being proud Democrats my whole life. Maybe their queer ass son pushed them over the edge.

Readers, I’m at a loss. Do I risk them ruining my graduation weekend? Should I trust that they actually don’t want to cause a scene? Maybe we can have dinner and officially break up. God knows it’s been on the docket for the past ten years. I recently made a promise to myself to not try to get them to accept me but to lay it all out and have them take it or leave it.

I feel a poem going on. I need to get off wordpress and make this graduation thing actually happen.

5 Responses to ““Knowing that We’re Conservative Christians…””
  1. Bubbles says:

    I really can’t think of anything to say about this… Just know that I love you for who you are.

  2. Emily says:

    Hey, I think they mean well. I mean, I know they are grasping for straws, but maybe by seeing you as you and sharing in a happy occasion like graduation, while seeing how accepting everyone is and how comfortable things are, maybe it’s ok. I think they love you and they really do want to be there for this occasion. Let them share in it, really. It could hurt a lot worse if they didn’t come. You know your parents better than I do, but I think it’s worth a shot.

    • e.a.irving says:

      Perhaps! It will be the Eli show this Sunday. Might be nice for them to hear me address my classmates and introduce them to all the faculty that seem to think I’m so neat. We’ll see. Full report will follow 🙂

  3. Rah Bee says:

    This is rather disturbing. BUT! It sounds like a great opportunity to dive into some enlightening conversation. The orgasm thing… wow. That is certainly a reach. Regarding the DNA comment, This is the opening I see for growth. Perhaps you should reflect some ideas on what you believe it means to be a man or a woman. The idea that we are nothing more than our chromosomal blueprint is belittling… no pun intended haha. I will now and always believe that the mind shall rule the body.

  4. cheyborg neckmonster says:

    Invite them to graduation, be a badass, go to dinner, tell them you’ll talk to them again in a year. Sounds like you already have a plan in the works. Good luck, and hugs to you.

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